That time of the Year

>> Sunday, March 16, 2008

Its March again and spring is here. Well officially there is no 'spring' in Bombay but there are subtle changes in the weather. Its that time of the year when I'm nostalgic about my school days. March nowadays means tax filing time. But once upon a time, long long it used to mean exam time. Trees begin to sprout new tender leaves which are in amazing and unique shades of green. Yes, look carefully and you can see these changes even in smog filled Bombay (wonder if that is the reason why green happens to be my favourite colour). I was going out for a client meet yesterday and chanced upon school children reading their textbooks on the way to exams. How I miss that period of my life. OK, I don't miss the exams per se, but I definitely miss school. I love the chatter of the children while they were boarding the school bus, the 'imliwalla' outside the school, boys pulling the ribbons of girls...some things remain the same.
I miss:
- Studying on my building terrace during exams.
- The disgust felt because you got that 1 mark 'fill in the blank' question wrong during exams.
- All my friends gathering in my building compound between two papers because it was close to school and very quiet and peaceful.
-The cuckoo singing and we teasing it and it reciprocating.
- The climbing of mango and jamun trees and plucking of raw mangoes and jamuns and the fighting for them when they were being distributed.
- Dreading the open house day.
- Coming out of the school with a big smile and your parents proudly announcing to the world that you that you are one of the toppers.
- The Enid Blytons that you used to devour during the vacations.
- The exchanging of story books.
- The playing of 'saakhli' and catch and hide and seek and 'daba is paais' till late.
- The coming back home with bruises and cuts.
- The gossiping on the compound bench till 10 in the night.
- The Rs. 5 'bhel' and 'rasna' parties on the terrace.
-The going to your grandparents place for the holidays.
- Watching the late sunsets from the terrace and the lovely hues the sky has during dusk.
- The chirping of the birds in the evening.
- The playing badminton in the compound after dinner.
- Discussing how great life would be once we started working and blowing money on clothes.
Ahh... those were the good old days...

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That stage of Life

>> Monday, March 10, 2008

OK. This post is very personal . But what the hell, there is nothing personal left about my life now, and since no one that I knows reads my blog, I might as well vent my feelings online.
It suddenly seems to have hit me that my biological clock is ticking away and I am yet to start taking baby steps to find the 'perfect guy'. Guess such a person does not exist. All the suitable men are already taken/are not interested. Some people just seem to find their partners so early in life/ manage to find someone equally suitable after a break off. Makes me wonder what is wrong with me? Or maybe as P mentioned, I'm not taking enough pains to find him. He does have a point though. I'm too shy to go out and don't mingle with people especially strangers. What do I expect? My prince charming to come riding on a horse???
I honestly believe that you should marry a man who is fit enough (and I do not mean just physically) to father your child. There seems to be a serious dearth of such men. Or maybe my criteria of a honest man is too high. Or I'm just plain tired to go through the whole routine again and have given up on everything. Or maybe I scare people away with my suspicious attitude and khadoos looks. Or maybe Ive been watching too many romantic movies to expect a miracle. But whatever the reason, I still have to find that special someone.
I even seem to remember the first time when I had this feeling that I need to have my own children. It was years ago when I saw this cute girl with her mother in a local train. Well, Ive seen even cuter kids with their mothers but that was the exact moment when I had this feeling. And I know for a fact that however lousy I might be a a wife, I shall definitely be a good mother.
I guess I shall shortly have to visit a sperm bank to have my wish fulfilled.
P.S. I saw a very cute scene today with three children squeezed under a newspaper vendor's stand and reading their school books. Wish I had a camera to capture it.

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